Tap to Read ➤

Has Feminism Really Ruined Relationships? What Do You Think?

Bindu swetha Jun 30, 2019
The word "feminism" is always wrongly associated with male bashing. However, the feminist value is to get equal rights for women. When she demands equal rights in relationships as well, this value of feminism is considered to be the relationship spoiler. Do you agree? Let's see what this post has in store.
"You don't have to be anti-man to be pro-woman."
- Jane Galvin Lewis
Feminism is nothing but mere ideologies that have evolved over a period of time. The very origin of this concept began in the olden times when women were the suppressed sex and the society was only male-dominant. Women were expected to look after their families and do all the household work, while men essayed the role of the breadwinner.
This patriarchal setup was followed for many decades until women started to speak up. They started to express their views and demanded an equal place in the society. Thus, the alteration to the male-dominated society began -- not smoothly though!

Ruiner or Liberator?

Practically speaking, feminism has not ruined relationships. There will be resistance to change in any aspect, and when this change is for the relationships that we cherish, the resistance is all the more stronger. For all this while, women have been in the not-so-important roles in their family lives.
Their views were not even asked for, leave alone considering them. But today, the scenario has changed. Women feel all the more liberated, and as a result of this, there is a shift in their role as well. Their opinions are now considered, and in some cases, they have their say too. This is what we call a true feminist society.

Man-Woman Relationship

Relationships are the need of our lives. Our love lives are important to each one of us, be it a feminist or not. But to keep one alive, can you go to any extent?

Relationship Spoiler

How many times have you come across girls being two-timed, or even three-timed by their boyfriends? You can fall out of love once, but how can you fall in love so many times?
Girls are dumped for being possessive, clingy, asking too many questions, career-oriented; in short for all the reasons that may frustrate men. The solution? They dump the girl for another. But hey, isn't your new love also a girl? Now, if the same is done by a girl, she is termed as a relationship breaker!
If you men get frustrated and dump your girl, so do we. Come on guys! We are also humans after all. Just because the girl has a career, earns money, is outgoing, has viewpoints on certain subjects -- a feminist as many would put it -- doesn't mean she is the one responsible for ruining the relationship!

Blame it on Ego

The current trend is to have both the husband and wife working. There is nothing wrong with this concept because to live a comfortable life, a two-income structure is a must.
What happens if the wife earns as much money as the husband, or even surpasses him? The ego clashes begin, and the relationship is threatened. If the woman is skillful and talented, she has the right to showcase them and pursue her career. However, this is in no way meant to demean the man.
In most of the cases, she is asked to either leave her job, or is blamed for not being a good homemaker. A woman's career is as important as the man's, and screwing it up for someone else's ego is not the wisest thing to do. Then, why blame her feminist views if the male ego is not pleased.


Who doesn't like to be heard and appreciated? Feminism just helped women in being self-satisfied. They are now heard more, and due to this change they find themselves more self-sufficient and satisfied than ever. Is it good for the relationship?
Of course it is. When the lady is satisfied with herself, she will be more at peace, and will bring more positivity to the relationship.

As the lady is self-satisfied, she would want to try out new things apart from the household-related activities. One of them may be the urge to know more about her surroundings and eventually increase her social awareness.
This will have a positive effect on the relationship as her man can discuss different topics with her. Men can talk about their careers, the share market, the latest football season -- actually anything under the sun, and they will get an interesting counterargument. Try it out guys, it is definitely interesting!

Donning the New Role

The differentiation lines between traditional roles of a 'homemaker' and 'breadwinner' have become thin in the modern-day society. With the number of working women increasing by the day, they are stepping into the shoes of the breadwinner, partly though!
Looking after the house and doing the household chores has to be distributed amongst both the genders. But a few are still stuck in the traditional mindset, and this is for sure creating a rift in relationships. Will you still want to blame it on the woman?

Starting Over

The relationship isn't working anymore and both the so-called lovers are feeling suffocated.
The best solution in such a situation is to go separate ways. The man gets to move on with his life and also gets to keep all the money for himself, giving the woman only a partial allowance of it (that too if they are married). Despite putting equal efforts and money in making a "home" out of a house, all she gets is alimony, a mere piece of the big cake.
She accepts this as well and moves ahead with a new man in her life. But hey, there are people around who are unhappy about this as well. If a girl -- a labeled feminist -- finds her new love interest shortly after her breakup, you know what people call her! No one uses those terms for a guy, do they? Double standards is all we can say.

Sibling Relationships

The divide between the genders starts during one's childhood itself. In many societies around the world, there is a great deal of discrimination between the girl and the boy child.
Boys are given a greater share of freedom early in their lives. This surely creates a negative image of the society in the minds of the girls and thus, the fight for getting an identity begins.
The girl child might start to fight with her brother to get her share of importance and freedom. As the child grows up, she faces more harsh realities of life and is forced to make a way for herself. Once the cracks appear in a relationship, they can only be mended but the cracked lines do show up. And a few blame feminists for ruining the relationships!

Workplace Relationships

With the beginning of the new era, the feminist movement has taken a step forward and has reached the corporate world. Today, women are considered for higher managerial positions in every industry. The interpersonal relationships between both the genders at the workplace is still tense as the patriarchal mindset hasn't yet given way to the feminist mindset.
The competition for promotions, bonuses, and stability in an organization are the rights that a feminist is still fighting for. In case she does get a good position in the organization, the whispers of her being involved with some top management personnel (of the opposite gender) starts doing the rounds.
Is this due to sheer jealously, or the fear of losing the rat race? However, the vice versa of the same situation is never seen.
When a man gets a good appraisal at the workplace, he is not accused of having personal relationships with the opposite gender at the top level! Just because the woman is outgoing and is ready to share all the responsibilities of her male counterpart successfully, it shouldn't make way for all such nuisance.
Basically, our society has a mindset of seeing a man at the authoritative position and woman as his supporting counterpart. It is therefore difficult to accept a woman in a commanding position, and this is the very basis of spoiled relationships. So guys, it is not the feminist values but the mindset that is straining relationships.